August 24, 2008

On men who long to be women

There are a large number of men out there that have secret dreams about how it would be like to be a woman.

I am not only talking about the visible ones, the cross-dressers and the transsexuals who have become public figures.

No, I am also talking about what appears to be "ordinary men", with no immediate plans for sex reassignment surgery or hormone treatments, but who nevertheless harbors feelings that many will find strange and hard to understand.

For the men involved this can be a huge problem, and I know what I am talking about, as I am one of them. Like many of them I have kept my "inner woman" secret, mainly because I find it hard to believe that the people closest to me would understand or accept this phenomenon, and partly because I am not sure what it all means.

I have explored the fantasies of transgendered people like me, found in forums like Rachel's Haven and A Bimbo's Sanctuary, in fiction sites like Fictionmania.

Sites like these have to my knowledge never been used for research of sexual psychology, but represents one of the most important sources of information on transgender fantasies.

I have also tried to go through new research on the topic, to see if science has anything sensible to say that can help people like us.

Moreover, I am going to test any scientific, psychological, religious or philosophical theory that might throw light upon the subject, how far fetched they may be.

I very much welcome your comments!

Jack

(and yes, Jack is an alias)

January 1, 2008

A Reader's Guide to the Crossdreaming and "Autogynephilia" Blog

This blog is about men who dream about having a female body, and women who dream about having a man's. Crossdreaming is actually much more common than you may think.This blog is for those who are trying to get to terms with such desires and others that might find the topic interesting.

Here are some essential blog posts to get you going:

What is crossdreaming?

Crossdreaming Described (Crossdreaming defined and described)


Discussions of crossdreaming (also referred to as "autogynephilia")

On the inner femininity of crossdreamers (On the theory arguing that innate femininity in men can lead to feminine homosexuality, transsexualism or crossdreaming)

The cause of crossdreaming - an alternative model (A popular presentation of the Natalie/Molay model of sex and gender variation).

Crossdreaming ("autogynephilia") as something normal (The O'Keefe Model that states that such erotic dreams are quite common)

On Gilmartin's love shy men and male lesbians (On meek men who are afraid to approach the women they worship).

The female and male copulation instinct (A discussion on how different copulation instincts may not always follow sexual orientation)

On the inborn sex identity (Using the story of Viktor/Viktoria and David Reimer I argue that there definitely is such a thing as an inborn sex identity and that crossdreaming may have a biological core).

The Massey University Study of Transgender People (On Jamie Veale's approach to gender variance and crossdreaming)

The Transgender Carl Jung (Using the concepts of Jungian psychology to understand crossdreaming.)


Wife of an autogynephiliac asks for help (On discovering that your husband is a crossdreamer)

Crossdreaming ("autogynephilia") and loneliness (On how to find love and keep it)

On the sex life of crossdreamers (On how to integrate crossdreaming in a heterosexual relationship)

Crossdreamer love (When male to female and female to male crossdreamers meet)

Is there a cure for  crossdreaming ("autogynephilia" or "autoandrophilia")? (On various therapies that have been used in order to cure crossdreaming)

Sally Molay's collection of sites, books, articles and more for the partners of crossdreamers and transgender people


On female to male crossdreamers (girlfags and "autoandrophiliacs")

FTM Crossdreaming ("autoandrophilia), on women who fantasize about having a man's body. (Some doubt that they even exist, but I know that there are quite a few women out there that dream about being a man in a sexual relationship with a man).

The transgender Kama Sutra (Is crossdreaming a product of modern Western civilization or is it ubiquitous? The presence  of female to male crossdreamers in the Kama Sutra tells us that there are crossdreamers everywhere and everywhen).

The Yaoi Culture and the female to male crossdreamers  (The female to male crossdreamers or "girlfags" are hiding in plain sight, expressing their transgender lives through Japanes style comics and stories.)

Ray Blanchard and the missing girlfag (On how Ray Blanchard proposed to include "autoandrophilia" in the American Psychiatric Manual, while at the same time denying the existence of female to male crossdreamers)

There are also a couple of blogposts over at my XD Express blog that might be of interest:


The autogynephilia theory

The term autogynephilia was introduced by the psychologist Ray Blanchard. He defined it as "a man's paraphilic tendency to be sexually aroused by the thought or image of himself as a female". Crossdreamers do definitely exist, but his explanation of the phenomenon is problematic, to say the least. The following posts discuss the theory in a critical way:

Autogynephilia on a Napkin (A popular illustrated presentation of the topic)

Autogynephilia dismissed (The main arguments against the theory)


Autogynephilia defined (A presentation of Anne Lawrence and her use of the term autogynephilia)

Autogynephilia: The Dark Side (On why the autogynephilia theory meets so much resistance in transgender circles)

Beyond the Perversion (More in depth discussion of the Blanchard theory)

On evolutionary biology

This series presents the views of biologist Joan Roughgarden and her social selection theory. Her approach represents a good alternative to the traditional binary approach to sex and gender.



Biological research


Gender

On the statistical differences between men and women (They are not as big as you think!)

Yes, there may be such a thing as an inborn sex identity! (Trans Express response regarding post-structuralist and radical feminist attempts at reducing sex identity to a socially constructed gender).

What Comic Book Hero Nemi Taught Me About Sex, Gender and Transgender




Spirituality

The spiritual life of a crossdreamer (Many crossdreamers try to incorporate their crossdreaming into their religious and spiritual life)

Spellbound transgender (On myths and fairy tales used in self exploration)


Explanation of terms

Transgender and transsexual dictionary

A Creative Crossdreamer Vocabulary (A list of imaginary and not so imaginary words to describe the crossdreamer experience)

These are just a few of the blog posts on this site. Use the table of contents and the tags in the right hand column to find more.


Trans Express

Trans Express is my tumblr blog for quick responses to trans, girlfag and crossdreamer topics.

You will find a list of essential blog post of broader interest here!


The Survey

The Crossdreamer Survey of Gender Variance 2014

Crossdreamer and transgender resource directory
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