tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post3279656369045133167..comments2024-03-26T16:19:11.382-07:00Comments on Crossdreamers: On crossdreamers and the role of transgender pornography part 2Sally Molayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02015510914816971645noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-90922300831809588512012-08-14T22:46:12.953-07:002012-08-14T22:46:12.953-07:00So I think this guy is smoking hot, see link below...So I think this guy is smoking hot, see link below.<br />Im a guy, my fantasy with him is almost always in the male role (I guess I could bottom for him, why not, but not a lot) I like that hes a guy who dresses like a girl for fun, I like that he doesnt plan to transition. I crossdressed as a kid but have found the need dropped off in my 20s. I also love girls. Now Im 30, I dont mind being labelled gay, bi, autogynephiliac, gynantromorphilics or whatever, but I sure would like to know which I am. And why. And what best to do about it. Help! :)<br /><br />If you dont trust clicking a link, google "boyshanon" on youtube and youll find him.<br /><br />http://youtu.be/bTvMza0TFQIvkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14560081499408417087noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-43225279590933842352012-08-14T22:43:57.702-07:002012-08-14T22:43:57.702-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.vkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14560081499408417087noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-25556659198707138142010-09-07T23:52:20.637-07:002010-09-07T23:52:20.637-07:00@Anonymous
"A lot of what you 'want'...@Anonymous<br /><br />"A lot of what you 'want' in life is influenced by what is acceptable to those around you."<br /><br />If you look at kids when they grow up, you will see how much they try to emulate the behavior of role models in order to try out their own identity. It is to be expected that adults also can do this, especially when they change their social role or status in the way trans people do.Jack Molayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03629363646482611722noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-38481419022057414982010-09-02T14:07:07.363-07:002010-09-02T14:07:07.363-07:00I've had relationships as a man with several t...I've had relationships as a man with several trans-women, in varying states of op-ness. I say that to verify that I have some real world experience rather than just academic study.<br /><br />One angle that is not being adequately addressed in the discussion of top/bottom and the cluster of M and F combos is the need to establish an identity that others will validate. A lot of what you 'want' in life is influenced by what is acceptable to those around you.<br /><br />The folks I've date were very different in their relation to their role in the bedroom early in transition to how they were once they felt established in their identity. Like a number of lesbian folks I know, switch is more the norm than fixed roles. One may like one aspect more, but it is hardly immutable.<br /><br />I don't think using paid relationships as a basis for what people like is a good idea either. What you want to do with someone you love vs someone who's paying you varies.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-22356532305026626122010-09-02T08:40:25.741-07:002010-09-02T08:40:25.741-07:00There a quite a few of them. Many lesbian relation...<i>There a quite a few of them. Many lesbian relationships (and lesbian erotic fantasies) are based on the traditional dichotomy masculine/aggressive vs. feminine/receptive.</i><br /><br />If any of you are interested in seeing this dynamic with your own eyes, you should watch some real "queer" porn that depicts butches and femmes being sexual with each other.<br /><br />"The Speakeasy" is a good title and is available from nofauxx.com<br /><br />http://nofauxxx.com/<br /><br />Watching this was quite a revelation for me as I'm sure it will be for others. Pay particular attention to who you identify while watching; the results may surprise you.Bitterness Barbiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15080082175885943270noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-141303453693676312010-09-02T01:41:54.321-07:002010-09-02T01:41:54.321-07:00@ Jamiegottagun
You have an excellent point, and...@ Jamiegottagun <br /><br />You have an excellent point, and it may sink my whole theory; I admit as much.<br /><br />I started out by saying (in part 1) that most M2F crossdreamers do <i>not</i> fantasize about being with a "shemale". This applies to crossdreamers identifying as men, transgenderists like yourself and post-op transwomen.<br /><br />So if some M2F crossdreamers do have this fantasy, it must be a matter of a psychological variation. After all crossdreamer fantasies do vary a lot, as do the fantasies of cisgendered people.<br /><br />My point is simply that for some it would make sense for them to have this fantasy, simply because it resolves the conflict between being attracted to women and the desire to be receptive when having sex. <br /><br />There are other solutions to this "problem" as well, including using props found in a lesbian life style. <br /><br />If we by "heterosexual" mean "being attracted to the female body" they would still be "heterosexual" (if they are identifying as men), although I readily admit that our traditional vocabulary is stretched to the limit when used this way.<br /><br />Transgenderists ("shemales") that are attracted to men, would not be considered "autogynephiliacs" by Ray Blanchard. If they have ever been turned on by dreaming of having a female body, I guess you could call them M2F crossdreamers. I am not so strict about these things. But in my posts I was focusing on gynephilic (woman-loving) M2F crossdreamers. <br /><br />I do get pretty academic and analytic in these posts, don't I? These ones were not based on research, however, but on the experience of crossdreamers I have been in contact with and my own life.Jack Molayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03629363646482611722noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-20652765818959668092010-09-02T00:35:45.890-07:002010-09-02T00:35:45.890-07:00Anonymous asked whether or not there are women out...Anonymous asked whether or not there are women out there who are attracted to "pre-op" FtM [female to male] transsexuals.<br /><br />There a quite a few of them. Many lesbian relationships (and lesbian erotic fantasies) are based on the traditional dichotomy masculine/aggressive vs. feminine/receptive. <br /><br />The "butch" may dress as a man, move like a man, talk like a man, and even treat her/his strap-on as the real thing. The "femme" plays the role of the receptive woman. <br /><br />This is not a perfect parallel, though. The real counterpart to M2F crossdreamer vs. "shemale" would be F2M man-loving (as opposed to lesbian gynephilic) biological woman vs. a F2M man-loving pre-op transman. <br /><br />They would both be dominant, but the first would want the transman to play the submissive role.<br /><br />(Are you with me this far? Well, I am confused :-) <br /><br />Anyway, this would be no more of a perfect match than the M2F crossdreamer vs. shemale constellation. The transman would not like to play the submissive.<br /><br />The main difference between the two constellations is a matter of anatomy and the dominant/non-dominant dichotomy. We are talking about a mirrored relationship here.<br /><br />The M2F crossdreamer is looking for someone who can penetrate him. The F2M crossdreamer is looking for someone she can penetrate. <br /><br />The "shemale" has the equipment the M2F crossdreamer is looking for, but the "shemale" would like to take the receptive role. Not a good match.<br /><br />In the case of the F2M crossdreamer vs. transman, the transman also has the required vagina, but he would rather be the one with the cock.<br /><br />It would make much more sense for the F2M crossdreamer to approach a femme, which -- as far as I understand -- many of them do. But that makes her a lesbian (gynephilic) or a bisexual. <br /><br />If the F2M crossdreamer is exclusively androphilic she would probably try to find a submissive man. <br /><br />The perfect match for the F2M crossdreamer would therefore be a gay submissive man. This is why so many of the F2M crossdreamers call themselves "girlfags". They consider themselves homosexual (or bisexual) men trapped in a woman's body. <br /><br />Unfortunately gay men are not interested in biological women, so the most realistic match for an F2M crossdreamer would be a submissive M2F gynephilic crossdreamer. That happens as well, and I am working on a post where I refer to concrete examples of such relationships.<br /><br />(I have now reread this comment several times to see if it makes any sense at all, that's how confusing it is to move outside the binary. I think I have got it right, though...)Jack Molayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03629363646482611722noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-73837382376348957412010-09-01T20:40:06.752-07:002010-09-01T20:40:06.752-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Bunnyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12533555060918801821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-70759371039712740862010-09-01T20:39:40.266-07:002010-09-01T20:39:40.266-07:00As a shemale, who dates men, I can't tell you ...As a shemale, who dates men, I can't tell you how hard it is for a girl like me to find a man that doesn't want ME to do you know what TO HIM.<br /><br />That is NOT heterosexual behavior.<br /><br />I love your blog. It really hits things hard, and you do a great job of uncovering and bringing to light research that most of us don't even know about.<br /><br />But....<br /><br />There's only so much book-learning, opinions, studies, and methodologies of researchers (most of whom are not gay, trans, or autogynephiliac) can accomplish.<br /><br />You have to take into account the real world, and the actual shemale experience.<br /><br />As part of your research, try browsing the "M for T" ads in the Casual Encounters romance section on any major metropolitan Craigslist.<br /><br />You will see that men wanting shemales to "flip the script" on them represent 95% of the interest in shemales shown by males.<br /><br />That is not heterosexual behavior, nor is it trans, or gynephiliac behavior.<br /><br />As far as shemale porn: I don't like it, and neither have I found another shemale or transsexual that likes it. And, most of us are autogynephiliacs. We don't like it because it always ends up casting the shemale in the role of the dominant partner, doing to the male, what we want him to do to us. When it comes to porn, most shemales and transsexuals taste runs more towards what your average woman likes: there's got to be some affection and tenderness shown, and the man has got to act like a MAN.<br /><br />Porking a guy is the biggest turnoff for any shemale. I have friends that will do it for money, but every one of them has to practically OD on Viagra to get the job done.<br /><br />See what I'm saying here? An autogynephiliac is not going to go out looking for a shemale to do that to him. I have never met another shemale, or transsexual that was ever interested in other shemales that way, before they became a shemale. I was never interested in shemales that way before I became one.<br /><br />It may look good on paper, but it doesn't match that actual real-life experience of your average shemale or transsexual.<br /><br />And if we're autogynephiliacs, which I think most of us are, then shouldn't we be having the same sexual interests that you attribute to these men?<br /><br />There's something else going on there, too. I don't know if they're gay, or what. Maybe they're something that hasn't been uncovered in the research, yet.Bunnyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12533555060918801821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-23573922398003091992010-09-01T20:37:29.645-07:002010-09-01T20:37:29.645-07:00Well, I guess you can imagine that most men whom a...Well, I guess you can imagine that most men whom are interested in shemales are not interested in a "gay" activity, but as a shemale, who dates men, I can't tell you how hard it is for a girl like me to find a man that doesn't want ME to do you know what TO HIM.<br /><br />That is NOT heterosexual behavior.<br /><br />I love your blog. It really hits things hard, and you do a great job of uncovering and bringing to light research that most of us don't even know about.<br /><br />But....<br /><br />There's only so much book-learing, laboratory studies, and the opinions, studies, and methodologies of researchers (most of whom are not gay, trans, or autogynephiliac) can accomplish.<br /><br />You have to take into account the real world, and the actual shemale experience.<br /><br />As part of your research, try browsing the "M for T" ads in the Casual Encounters romance section on any major metropolitan Craigslist.<br /><br />You will see that men wanting shemales to "flip the script" on them represent 95% of the interest in shemales shown by males.<br /><br />That is not heterosexual behavior, nor is it trans, or gynephiliac behavior.<br /><br />As far as shemale porn: I don't like it, and neither have I found another shemale or transsexual that likes it. And, most of us are autogynephiliacs. We don't like it because it always ends up casting the shemale in the role of the dominant partner, doing to the male, what we want him to do to us. When it comes to porn, most shemales and transsexuals taste runs more towards what your average woman likes: there's got to be some affection and tenderness shown, and the man has got to act like a MAN.<br /><br />Porking a guy is the biggest turnoff for any shemale. I have friends that will do it for money, but every one of them has to practically OD on Viagra to get the job done.<br /><br />See what I'm saying here? An autogynephiliac is not going to go out looking for a shemale to do that to him. I have never met another shemale, or transsexual that was ever interested in other shemales that way, before they became a shemale. I was never interested in shemales that way before I became one.<br /><br />It may look good on paper, but it doesn't match that actual real-life experience of your average shemale or transsexual.<br /><br />And if we're autogynephiliacs, which I think most of us are, then shouldn't we be having the same sexual interests that you attribute to these men?<br /><br />There's something else going on there, too. I don't know if they're gay, or what. Maybe they're something that hasn't been uncovered in the research, yet.Bunnyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12533555060918801821noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-40845659552518846012010-09-01T11:20:12.166-07:002010-09-01T11:20:12.166-07:00Perhaps an obvious question we should be asking: w...Perhaps an obvious question we should be asking: whether or not there are women out there who are attracted to "pre-op" FtM transsexuals.<br /><br />Is this a phenomenon limited to one group?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com