tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post8420075826524247659..comments2024-03-26T16:19:11.382-07:00Comments on Crossdreamers: On crossdreaming, Asperger and KlinefelterSally Molayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02015510914816971645noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-42734265893266109402018-02-25T07:13:50.499-08:002018-02-25T07:13:50.499-08:00Hi sir, I am an aspie and a homoeopathy practition...Hi sir, I am an aspie and a homoeopathy practitioner in India. I read the post about Tina i have some doubts and a am not criticising but he /she says he or she is clear cut case of klinfelters (not diagnosed by doctor) and in next line says he/she removed her breasts. No surgeon will do surgery unless he or she knows why is surgery being done. A man who feels he is a woman, then such people don't do marrying, it is possible though. I feel it is just for curiosity, it could be truth also. But it is possible to have those conditions together. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-21167582956429971142012-06-30T15:39:49.396-07:002012-06-30T15:39:49.396-07:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-35610127331110572162012-06-28T00:07:27.300-07:002012-06-28T00:07:27.300-07:00@Emilie
I tend to agree. Being socially awkward o...@Emilie<br /><br />I tend to agree. Being socially awkward or shy as an adult is most often caused by negative experiences as a kid.<br /><br />On the other hand, it seems that basic psychological personality traits like introversion and empathy may be partly inborn.But you may perfectly well be socially confident and emphatic at the same time.Jack Molayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03629363646482611722noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-51036989569026369102012-06-27T14:31:14.909-07:002012-06-27T14:31:14.909-07:00Some of my traits,
I was born and raised in Cali...Some of my traits, <br /><br />I was born and raised in California, when I speak Hebrew I sound like a Russian, When I speak English I sound southern. Of course I learned Hebrew in the Israeli army my whole squad were mother tongue Russian, and I grew up interacting with allot of southern people form Texas and Louisiana. <br /><br /> My hearing is very keen, sometimes I can't deal with bright lights or flashing lights They hurt my eyes. <br /><br /> Though Ive always had empathy, an example when I was five my father and his friends were throwing darts at Saddam Hussiens face. I asked them to stop because it would probably hurt the mans feelings if he knew.<br /><br />Another example I cried when they killed white fangs mother in the movie I was also a child than, Another example I wept when I heard about a hate crime in Texas where they dragged a man to death I was ten my empathy was natural I never had time to learn it. <br /><br /> Oh and I had a hard time looking people in the eyes lol <br /><br /> So they gave me drugs for adhd and autism and now my body is a little off male. I don't mind it though cause I'm a being in between anyways. <br /><br /> I'm just saying maybe being socially awkward is a of a nurture than nature thingEmillie Vanyahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02479457964329816572noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-52578925027004442752012-05-02T01:37:38.308-07:002012-05-02T01:37:38.308-07:00@Kelly
Aggression is one variable I have not had ...@Kelly<br /><br />Aggression is one variable I have not had much time to discuss. It is clear that aggression is an important part of the sexuality of many men and women, but by all means not all. <br /><br />Culturally aggression has been associated with male behavior, even if we all know very aggressive women. <br /><br />Hence aggression is associated with dominance, seduction, testosterone and a strong libido.<br /><br />If you have a low level of aggression, finding peace in the traditional woman's role should be easier than living up to the hyperactive standards of modern men.<br /><br />Personally I am at loss when it comes to understanding my own life in this context. <br /><br />I am normally known as a calm, peaceful and including man but on the inside I may become seriously pissed off. I can be dominant socially, but is clearly submissive sexually. I am introvert by nature, but can be very offensive in socia settings. These are very complex phenomena, indeed!<br /><br />The fact that you as an XXY feel less aggressive or sexually driven, tells us that the theory that XXYs are more sexually charged is not necessarily true.Jack Molayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03629363646482611722noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-53057217428549429582012-05-01T13:35:30.187-07:002012-05-01T13:35:30.187-07:00I really relate to the comment made about symbolic...I really relate to the comment made about symbolic violence, I avoid most men and women because there is an aggression in normal people that is completely missing in me.<br /><br />I to have the xxy makeup and I'm a aspie (aspergers)and never was able to make the leap into becoming a typical male and my mind is calmed when I emulate a female but I have never experienced any erotiscism and find I'm largely indifferent to sex which comes from that lack of aggression that is in typical men and women but if I was a genetic female think I could sexually express who I am.<br /><br />It is extremely easy for me to step into the social roles usually assigned to women. KellyKatherine Kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18160143287809113930noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-53288680091667644292012-03-11T04:14:58.425-07:002012-03-11T04:14:58.425-07:00Yes, I've wondered in the past whether I was s...Yes, I've wondered in the past whether I was somewhere on the autism spectrum, especially as there is already Asperger's in our family. But it doesn't quite fit really.<br /><br />Whereas, this...<br />http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avoidant_personality_disorder<br />...on the other hand, seems absolutely spot on.Jonathanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17147186679298442560noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-64832388212213180902012-03-11T00:00:17.862-08:002012-03-11T00:00:17.862-08:00It is interesting to consider whether or not Asper...It is interesting to consider whether or not Asperger's has an effect it probably does, and i have no doubt that there are some crossdreamers that have it. Me personally i have had a few things that have affected me firstly i was overweight most of my life and secondly i was diagnosed with dyslexia(fun for a person with it) i am not actually sure if i have it but if i do i have worked past it. And i have always have difficulty keeping friends, not that i can't make them i just don't take it further for the fact of my personal problems. <br />I though of something about people who have identity problems. I think that the reason why people who have them became introverted is because of the pressure society puts on them. They want to be something other than what those people around them expect of them and so the withdraw inward so they can hid that part of them from other people,that's how i feel sometimes. I think that explains why some people with those kinds of problems have that have that with it. But there is a strong possibility that there are other influences as well.Seannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-2897974720483581082012-03-10T05:23:14.416-08:002012-03-10T05:23:14.416-08:00I also can relate to many symptoms describing the ...I also can relate to many symptoms describing the daily life of an aspie although having overlapping behavior is by no means a proof of having the same core issues.<br /><br />Social awkardness is something I believe most crossdreamers can relate. It may not be caused by some kind of autism, but result from having an identity that doesn't fit with social expectations.<br /><br />I think I have become a pro at mimicking good social interractions, although I have a core feeling of playing a role each time I have to intervene, set up a discussion, or party with my peers. This feeling of role playing will never leave me.<br /><br />I have grown as an introverted child who was told to be totally spaced out and daydreamy. I had a few friends who didn't care too much about my awkardness but usually I have a history of rejection and misunderstanding.<br /><br />My langage was really different, and still is when I interact with other adults. I sometimes speak in a writing style, using a lot of conjunctions and polishing a lot the words that I use.<br /><br />My dating failures are also linked to the fact that I have grown unable to pick nonverbal cues. I would see people dating and have no idea about what to do or say, the steps to follow, the posture to adopt whereas the girls I dated would have a clear understanding about how things are supposed to happen.<br /><br />I have compensated a lot throughout years, and am now able to pass as a skilled social communicator but as I said this has always been some kind of role play for me. It means that social relationships are never inate for me. I don't automatically know how to behave according to a certain context.<br /><br />I can also relate to the narrow interest trait. Although I think "narrow" is a very pejorative term since philosophy of langage,or epistemology of sciences open my mind much more than any social babbling. I feel often that those interest exclude me from conversations, and this exclusion is reinforced by symbolical violence.<br /><br />Symbolical violence can be spoted in many situations :<br />- Which subjects are debated and who initiates them?<br />- Who is able to turn the tide of a conversation (ie switching the topic)?<br />- What topics are excluded from the scope of the discussion?<br />- What are the speech patterns required for someone to be listened?<br /><br />and so on. I would often be pissed of being qualified as shy or introverted whereas I would be totally available and passionate to discuss topics that matter for me. There are also discussions in which I found myself disagreing with everybody, but feel that if I want to make things clear, I will have to lecture them for half an hour...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-35841503399067938512012-03-09T13:43:39.460-08:002012-03-09T13:43:39.460-08:00p.s: management of* :) (speaking of being a dumb l...p.s: management of* :) (speaking of being a dumb lol)AriadnaAzulnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-75655774674808312062012-03-09T13:39:06.799-08:002012-03-09T13:39:06.799-08:00p.s: I still can't read faces!!!! I always ha...p.s: I still can't read faces!!!! I always have to ask directly to the other person what emotions they r feeling, bc I really can't get the cues.....AriadnaAzulnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-16431577244765504372012-03-09T13:24:40.760-08:002012-03-09T13:24:40.760-08:00Eye contact is still something extremely unbearabl...Eye contact is still something extremely unbearable for me, and when I enter into a shop where I'll have contact with strangers (such as a the clerk) I kind of "rehearse" in my mind the things i'll say, the tone, and the gestures i'll do, all like a theather script: "good morning, would u help me, thanks.", and during my adolescence, I was considered a kind of robot with no emotions. Although, I have changed a lot since then, I have educated myself to a point I "made up" a new more social and confident personality: nowadays I can't recognize myself in that odd girl who never laughed, smiled or cried. To smile is a very calculated gesture I coulnd't do without a long training: it still causes me a bit of troubles, but certainly I am at a point I lead ppl to think my smiles are spontaneuos and natural (even "pretty").<br /><br />I also have a disbalance in the sensibility of my senses: my hearing is over reactive to my dismay. Noises that can be bearable for others cause me extreme suffering, also my sight is extremely sensitive too, I tend to prefer darker environments bc of the extreme discomfort natural and artificial lights cause me. On the other hand, my taste is under developed and I often don't notice I am eating something rancid until my stomach hurts XD<br /><br />Also, mom and one of my siblings have the same "symptoms". I guess they are aspies too. I have references about my grandpa (mom's dad) who was said to be a "loser" who lived on clouds, always obsessed with maths, never paying attention on "mundane" issues.<br /><br />There are a lot of other aspie traits that I have that I won't mention. About the monotonal voice, I never had it, and surfing in those specialized sites, they don't list it as a distinctive aspie trait. Some have, other don't, but certainly i still have issues with my voice (i have different and unappropiate tones depending on my mood, i struggle to adjust it to be socially acceptable, but ppl barely notice this)AriadnaAzulnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-42487381006487038082012-03-09T13:20:15.142-08:002012-03-09T13:20:15.142-08:00Hey, Jack, I am an aspie myself (although self-dia...Hey, Jack, I am an aspie myself (although self-diagnosed). I have taken tests online for AQ and I always score moderately high. Some people around me might think I am "normal" and may not believe I am an aspie, bc female aspies cope better with it and can hide it. (in fact there's a book called: "Pretending to be normal" written by a female aspie)<br /><br />"There's also a suggestion that Girls are generally recognized as superior mimics. Those with Asperger Syndrome hold back and observe until they learn the 'rules', then imitate their way through social situations." - Tony Attwood<br /><br />Also as I have been reading online, there's a link between "tomboyish" behavior, "emotional maleness" and female aspies.<br /><br />I don't know how all this could be linked to crossdreaming, but I have noticed it is a bit easier for me to meet aspie fellows in the crossdreaming community than in an average social environment (pls dear fellow-crossdreamers-aspies, rise ur hands!)<br /><br />Also, it is said AS is not a condition itself but a certain point in a range of normality, (a range that could be called "neurodiversity", where aspies and neurtypicals belong to as a variety of normality). It is the thought of being "autistic" what could be misleading about a diagnosis. An aspie is a half way between neurotypical and autistic. People often takes into consideration only that autistic half, but not the other "normal" half.<br /><br />I have read recently that "giftedness" could be confused with AS but I am pretty sure I am not gifted. Even if, when I was a toddler, my parents and people around me used to think I was "gifted" for some pseudo-symptoms of "hyperlexia": I started reading at a very young age, way before the other kids, also I had a remarkable manage of my native language at a very early age, according to what my mother say; among other "curiosities": mom says ppl used to say I was a "little adult", and my favorite toys were mom's dictionaries, books, notebooks and pens. My first readings weren't fairy tales but newspapers and "reader's digest" XD (in fact I still remember what those readings were about) But certainly my IQ is low to be considered "gifted" (130). I am aware of my limitations: I hardly find myself smart (and that... when I am not being a dumb... lol) <br /><br />If anyone asked me why I think I am an aspie, I'd say: my lack of social skills/intense social ackwardness/physical clumsiness/intense focused interests. Even if I managed to have some friends during my life. i feel it costed me a lot (to make them and to keep them) bc of my frankness, narrow interests and uninterest in physical activities. Also, it is noticeable (for ppl who are around me) that I have intense intellectual obsessions and interests. I have been raised in an environment that wasn't the best for encouraging academic goals (I'd dare say, it was quite the opposite: intensely discouraging), but i have managed to learn English and other languages (also basic notions of music and classical piano) as a self-taught. I have an odd goal: to be able to sing in 20 foreign languages (so far I can in 9) and understand their basic grammars (besides I wanna speak at least 6 languages fluently). I always had hobbies that ppl around me found "odd" or "useless" such as learn cyrillic alphabet just for fun or learn everything about french revolution. They can't understand why someone would learn those things if it is not for an exam.AriadnaAzulnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-24857180576192079552012-03-06T11:25:31.963-08:002012-03-06T11:25:31.963-08:00No mention of 'mono tonal' voice patterns ...No mention of 'mono tonal' voice patterns with Aspergers symptoms? Usually the voice alone can give a clue to if a person has Aspergers.Cheryl Sussexhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02512809610979507630noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2472400923228993687.post-3360979262563225212012-03-06T09:07:03.535-08:002012-03-06T09:07:03.535-08:00Hey Jack,
Thank you so much for the detailed an...Hey Jack, <br /><br /> Thank you so much for the detailed analysis of my email. As I keep learning about myself, I keep finding new things. Its just a peeling an onion, where things appear one after the other. <br />As I told in my mail that I am nowhere connected with medical profession. It might have a bearing on my knowledge. I established the connection between KF, Asperger and crossdressing when I read a number of articles which connected for e.g. KF and Asperger, Asperger and crossdressing and like that but never all together.<br />It was indeed rare to get an article which talked about all of them and crossdreaming /or AGP in the same article.<br />When I started looking at the individual characteristics, I found that most of the time I was an intersection of various characteristics of all of these phenomena.I still have for example difficulty in eye gazing even though I am not introvert. I shy from people and shun social gatherings but if I ever get into social situations, I can really become life of the party. This is kind of contradiction to me. <br />There are so many difficult problems that I have overcome only by effort, that now when I look at the symptoms I used to have, I often chuckle and say "yeah that one too". <br />Reading your post, I can easily say that I match many of the characteristics you have mentioned. <br />As I learn more about myself, I feel sad that sometimes people find it difficult to understand my behavior, which may get a little variable and which makes me an unpredictable person.Even my crossdressing/dreaming also waxes and wanes. Most of the time I cannot stop myself from for example having mood swings. I can talk whole day ;)<br /><br />Its only with learning and reading your blog and articles on internet, I am able to know more about myself.<br /> <br />I really enjoyed this post and would love to hear from others. Of course they can always contact me on the email you mentioned in the post.Tinanoreply@blogger.com