July 31, 2010

A Crossdreamer's Journey

I am so glad to see that more people have started blogging about crossdreaming and autogynephilia.

By giving your inner woman a voice, you help demystifying this phenomena, which again helps other crossdreamers make sense of their lives.

A Crossdreamer's Journey is a new blog written in the voice of the inner woman of a M2F crossdreamer called Jim. Her name is Sarah Murphy.

Jim likes girls, she writes. According to "common knowledge", that makes him heterosexual. However, during fantasizing, he would sometimes take the female role:

"Following that logic, people who do both hetero and homo things are bisexual. As he used to explain it, his 'bisexuality' is an extension of his heterosexuality. But in his fantasies he was not playing the part of a male 'receiving' another male, e.g. gay. he was playing the part of a female receiving her male lover, e.g. hetero. Paradox again."

The blog looks into that paradox. Take a look!


  1. Well, Jim's condition is more or less similar to me. I like girls but love emotional sex with guys a lot, because I love the affection and love a guy could show to me that way. In that respect, during a sexual fantasy with a guy, I sometimes take the female role. But the difference is that I simply never feel like imagining myself as a woman and stop short of it, and remain as a feminine guy.

  2. The comparison of my fantasy with Jim's shows clearly that they are more or less same but fundamentally different with respect to the gender of the self expressed. This means gender identity as well as sexuality represents a continuum rather than two discrete poles miles apart.

  3. @ivano

    Do you know of researchers who has looked into the various expressions and feelings of bisexuality? Or are there any bisexual blogs we should take a look at, to study the difference between identifying as a man and identifying as a woman?

  4. Jack,
    At present I know of no scientist who has given a good viw of male bisexuality. But there are many blogs I have gone through which depicts male bisexuality to be quite prevalent but very pitifully hidden under carpet. Many men here have confessed that they are being open about their gay side fantasies only in these online blogs but have never come out in the real world.
    I am yet to come across many men who have had exclusive AGP trype fantasies (where they become full women) but I have met many men who do love to take feminine role during sex with guys but masculine role during sex with women.

    However, Mark Simpson has perhaps been the first columnist to be highly vocal about metrosexual femininity as well as male bisexuality.

    I came across a good article here which links bisexuality with desire for androgyny in some people.

  5. @ivano

    Thank you very much! Just what I needed.


  6. I've just identified with this at a very late age, but it makes so much sense. Just a few weeks ago I came across the theory (?) of autogynephilia and a light went off, a major light-burst.

    Commonalities, include intense feelings of femininity that rise to the level of affecting my behavior before I know it's happening, I just lapse into my female side and I'm suddenly aware I'm siting with a group of straight men with my legs tucked under my butt. I wore women's underwear and was exhilarated, but i only did this for a few short periods in my life, (not liking the discomfort of wearing panties all day) so crossdressing only sorta applies. I've felt the only solution was that I was gay, but repeated experiments always left me feeling like a fake.

    I guess I fall into the category of it being an internally expressed autogynephiliac, but I fantasize heavily about submitting to a powerful female Mistress. Then again, I'm more of a typical hetero male submissive, and forced femminization doesn't appeal to me. interestingly, TS, shemales have had a special appeal to me.

  7. @Anonymous,

    Yepp, there are a lot of crossdreamers sharing your particular fascinations. Why don't you tell your story over at crossdreamlife.com ?


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